How to Stop Caring What People Think When Starting a Business
Most people will never chase what they actually want.
And most of the time they actually know what they want.
They don’t pursue it because of someone else’s opinion.
They stay in the wrong career because someone told them that changing isn’t right.
They avoid starting their business because people keep saying that it won’t work.
They don’t do social media because people might criticize them.
These years have passed.
An entire life spent on decisions designed for an audience that isn’t even watching.
Here’s how to stop caring what people think when starting a business.
Why We Care So Much About Other People’s Opinions
Caring about other people’s opinions isn’t a flaw.
It’s biology.
We’re designed to work in society, so belonging to a social group is crucial for most people.
And being rejected was always dangerous.
But most people don’t follow the right people’s opinion.
And this is what’s keeping you from building what you actually want to build.
Because of social media, this aspect became so much worse.
Everything is now public and measurable.
Your content is either accepted or rejected.
People might like you or not.
And you can actually see it in real time.
This constant measurement trains your brain to work for others’ approval.
Then there’s school, which always values conformity.
If your family was like mine, they always wanted me to fit in.
Study hard, follow a stable job, save, and retire.
And those who actually go through another way get questioned.
So you learn to care, and it’s very hard to stop it.
The Hidden Cost Of Living for Approval
Living for approval is paid slowly and you can’t even see it.
How many people do you know that keep inferiorizing their life?!
They regret not traveling more, not quitting their jobs, not following their passion.
Even your career is followed by what seems respectable.
Nowadays working in construction is seen as unworthy. Which says a lot about society.
Who’s going to build your house, agency, or shopping mall?
Just because most people underrate these jobs doesn’t mean they aren’t needed.
With social media, even more. 9-5 workers are visible as inferior. And that shouldn’t happen.
You shouldn’t follow your career or decisions based on money, or opinions.
You should focus on what makes you have a complete life.
I know people who worked all their lives in a 9-5 happier than some business owners.
The Truth About What People Actually Think
Most people are too focused on themselves to think about you as much as you think they are.
You overestimate how much other people notice and remember what you do.
I always thought everyone saw my failures, embarrassing moments, or even imperfect posts.
But that’s not true.
They noticed and ignored it after one minute.
The People You Shaped Yourself Around Weren’t Paying as Much Attention as You Thought
People will always judge. But after an hour they absolutely forgot everything.
Even if you dance or sing in public. Even if you post an embarrassing video.
It might be talked about for a minute, but I can assure you people don’t care about it as much as you think.
Don’t you regret not doing things because of what others might think?
People are dealing with their own insecurities, flaws, and problems.
You are the main character in your life, not in theirs.
And those who judge you are the ones who aren’t building anything relevant or worth building.
Think about it.
Do you see a business owner judging someone starting their own business?
Do you see an athlete judging someone trying their sport for the first time?
Those you see are the ones who failed, quit, or didn’t even try.
The loudest critics are almost always the people on the sidelines.
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How to Stop Caring What People Think When Building a Business
Separate Whose Opinion Matters
Not everyone’s opinions deserve equal weight.
Think about the people whose opinions generally matter to you.
Those who love you, and actually care about you and your well-being.
People who have proved that they actually made it, whether they are mentors or even people you admire online.
That list may be very small, probably less than 5 people.
But the truth is that everyone else is just noise.
They could be the best person on earth, but that isn’t what matters.
What matters is their opinion and if it’s relevant to you and your life.
Ask Yourself- Will This Matter in 5 Years?
Most things that seem embarrassing are forgotten within days.
Your business idea got criticized or even failed.
Is that going to matter in 5 years?
Probably not.
That won’t even matter to you. But if you decide to quit, then the story changes completely.
But if the answer is no, then their opinion isn’t worth changing your direction for.
Realize Judgment Says More About Them Than You
When someone judges you for trying to build something that they didn’t even try, then the judgment isn’t about you.
It’s about them.
Their fear. Their discomfort. Their regret.
They feel threatened by someone who is doing what they didn’t dare to do.
Because in the end, people who are truly happy with their career, business, or even life, don’t spend time criticizing yours.
Start Before Feeling Ready
Most people think that they should wait until they feel ready.
But the reality is that preparation isn’t happening.
You’ll feel more unready than when you started.
Launch your imperfect business, your imperfect post, or even your imperfect project.
Prepare yourself by doing it publicly until you’re ready for the public.
You’ll learn more from actually trying it rather than just researching and waiting for the perfect moment.
The fear of judgment is almost always worse than the judgment itself.
By the time you start working in public, you’ll realize most people don’t actually care, they feel uninterested, not hating.
I didn’t tell anyone about my blog, and probably only five people know about it.
Not because I was ashamed, but because I wasn’t ready to defend it before I had proven it to myself.
Nowadays I still don’t go around telling people about this blog, but if someone asks me, I don’t have any interest in hiding it anymore.
Build an Identity That Doesn’t Depend on Approval
Know what you stand for. What you tolerate. And most importantly, know what you’re building, including your goals.
When what you have in your mind is clear, there is nothing or anyone that can pressure you.
You’re not looking for someone to confirm who you are and what you stand for.
You already know it.
This takes time, it’s built through hard decisions and values tested under pressure.
But, eventually, you’ll have enough evidence that you can trust yourself.
Accept That Some People Will Always Have Something to Say
You cannot control what people think.
And most importantly, you can’t control how other people feel or act.
But I can guarantee you that, no matter if you start or don’t, some people always have something to say.
The only thing you can change is how impactful those words and actions are on you.
The goal isn’t to reach a point where nobody judges you.
The goal is to reach a point where their judgment stops being the decision maker in what you do.
The People Who Judge You Usually Never Start
Here’s the thing about the people who judge you.
They aren’t ahead of you. They’re watching you.
Those who criticized your business idea didn’t start one.
And those who criticize your business idea are usually the same ones who one-up others to feel better about themselves.
Those who tell you that you’re wasting your time haven’t risked their own.
See what’s in common with all these statements?
They didn’t try.
So let me ask you this: Are you going to let your decisions be made by people who didn’t even try?
Judgment from people who didn’t try isn’t expertise. It’s their way of showing their fear of you being more successful than them.
Because those who actually made it, those who are where you want to be, aren’t judging you because you started.
And that’s because they know how they felt when they started.
They also suffered from hate, envy, and criticism.
And they know that judgment costs you nothing and helps nobody.
Final Thoughts
You’ll never please everyone.
Even if you donated one million dollars to a charity.
And everyone’s approval isn’t going to make your life better.
In the long run, it only gets worse. And that’s because you didn’t fulfill your dreams, goals, and expectations.
Live for yourself. Build what you actually want to build. Say what you actually think.
Start what you’ve been delaying for months, or even years.
Most of the time you’ll never see those who criticized you again.
The right people will respect you more for it.
And the wrong ones were never in the same room as you.
Let them talk, it’s probably the best thing they’ve done all day.
